Loose Threads, Memorial Day Weekend Edition:

  • The Hamptons, land of the $97 lobster salad, is like the travel version of greedflation. WSJ reports that young women who feel pressured to take a weekend trip there together to avoid FOMO during the summer can easily spend $5,000 each.

On the subject of rich locales, let us now turn to Cannes…

Arbitrary Cannes Fashion Awards

The Cannes Film Festival just wrapped in the south of France, having banned naked dresses and obtrusive trains, a sexist move for our inordinately sexist times. You could argue that, if the event wanted to distinguish itself from Miami nightclubs, this was a step in that direction. The festival’s dress code mandates “formal” attire, and made headlines in 2015 when it allegedly turned women away from a Carol screening because they weren’t wearing high heels. Miami door people also do this like it’s normal, as men who have put in a fraction of the effort into their appearance as most women stride past the velvet rope in sneakers and shirts that look cheaper than Shein headbands. However, a human Miami door filter would be as likely to turn up their nose at a “naked” dress as he would a matte black cyber truck (a real thing I saw late last year in Miami, wow!). So, congratulations, Cannes fashion police: you’ve somehow made yourself more obnoxious than Miami nightclubs.

Dress codes aside, the fashion was still fun to follow. The rules may have even left more room for variation in the clothes than the Met Gala’s tailoring theme, even though the festival spotlights actresses, who tend to play it relatively safe. Making up for that was Alexander Skarsgård, who aired out Saint Laurent’s famous thigh-high men’s boots and somehow made them look as natural as an excessively large yacht in the Mediterranean.

My main complaint about Cannes this year (and just about all red carpet events these days) is how predictable the clothes have become, since fashion followers generally know who gets paid to wear what brand, and there’s little variation or surprise in which labels a celeb picks. This means that personal style at these things, with some notable exceptions, feels like something that’s bought and sold like a bag on the resale market.

Here are Back Row’s arbitrary Cannes Fashion Awards.

Best Theme Dressing by an Actor: Alexander Skarsgård

This man (or his stylist Harry Lambert) clearly took some notes about Margot Robbie’s 2023 Barbie press tour or Zendaya’s in 2024 for Dune 2, and gave us some good viral theme dressing. Promoting his movie Pillon, in which he plays a biker starting up a BDSM relationship, he wore thigh-high boots, blue sequined pants, and leather pants, drawing headlines like “You Cannot Tell Alexander Skarsgård's Legs What to Do” and “Alexander Skarsgård Is the God of Fashion Chaos at Cannes.” Women can’t wear trains, but this man Cannes wear whatever he wants.

Best Dressed:

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